They're Everything I'm Not
by miyame-chan
Summary: All girls are jealous of the Clique, especially Olivia Ryan. Why wouldn't they be? The Pretty Committee is everything they want to be.


Hey! Enjoy!

Thanks to my cousins for being the first to read this fanfic and helping me edit it! Love ya forever, guys~!

Sadly, I do not own The Clique. :):

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><p>They're Everything I'm Not<p>

Olivia Ryan hated herself for being so imperfect. Why can't she be like the Pretty Committee? And everytime she thought of this, she found herself staring at her reflection in the mirror. It was a habit she formed over the years, a habit she wasn't particularly fond of—as it would make her more aware of her imperfections—but it wasn't like she could stop.

She regarded her reflection with disgust. All she saw was the blonde hair, expressive blue eyes, and caramel-colored skin—what a stereotypical American teenage girl looked like. Olivia was pretty, yes, but that's not all she wanted. She wanted to be different, she wanted to be like the Pretty Committee.

Almost immediately, her reflection was replaced by something else. Unclear at first, but when she realized what she was seeing, she had the urge to hurt something at the mirror.

She was seeing a person that was born from perfection itself—a person she could never become.

The person had Alicia's highly envied black hair, Massie's infamous half-smirk, Dylan's humor, Kristen's brains, Claire's innocence, and a _whole lot more_.

Sometimes, Olivia wished someone had invented a Perfect Cookie. She'll do anything just to have a taste of that cookie. But, just like a five year old, begging for a taste of a chocolate chip cookie before dinner, she knew that'll _never_ happen.

So, she tried to hang on, and tried to make the best of her pretty, yet un-Pretty Commitee-like self.

Sure, some people regarded her as cute, pretty even but that still wasn't enough for her. (Didn't they know that cute stemmed from the word ugly?) After all, she is jealous of the Pretty Commitee. People worshiped them. Her? People just regarded her as an option_._ She was like a nominee to who would be the prettiest girl. A nominee who lost.

oo00oo

Olivia stared at her toilet as she watched as the bits of food go down the drain. She was actually surprised something went out of her stomach... it's been a while since she had something to eat.

Images of the Pretty Committee laughing giggling and talking about her swam around her mind. Images of the hot Briarwood boys ignoring her danced right in front of her. Images of her being jealous of the Pretty Committee, and trying hard to be like them mocked her.

She gasped for air as she stood up. She felt dizzy, but kept on going to her cabinet. She opened it, and took out a bunch of random boxes full of pills and bottles full of liquid.

She swallowed a pill, and then drank the liquid. She repeated the sequence until everything was finished.

oo00oo

"Ugh..." Olivia sat down on the cold cover of her toilet, massaging her temples. Her head was about to burst, and to make matters worse, she felt like the whole world was going round and round.

_Thud! _The blonde's head connected with the side of granite table. A few moments later, she felt something trickling down her face. Her vision was blurry, but she could still see the color: a pretty shade of red that made her feel sicker. Blood.

Groaning, Olivia tried her best to stand up without wobbling, but she couldn't.

"It hurts," she moaned. She didn't know what was the "it," though. Or maybe it was her whole body. "Guh..."

She grabbed the nearest bottle and squeezed it tightly, shutting her eyes close. Then, she stared at the blurry figure for a while. The words were hard to read because of the tears gathering in her eyes, but she was able to catch one word.

"Isn't this a painkiller...? Why... do I have this?"

Maybe because she just wanted the pain to end.

_I wanted to be like the Pretty Committee. Gorgeous, witty, confident. Perfect. After all, they're everything I'm not._

Until finally, she let go of the bottle. The bottle fell to the floor with a loud crash, crashing into a million sharp shards. One fragment hit Olivia's hand; her hand slamming hard onto the tiles. But she didn't care. Why would she? When she couldn't feel anything anymore.

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><p>Pls. review!<p>

This is my second complete fanfic and first one-shot!

Before I say good bye, a word from Olivia's spirit:

Hello, everyone! I would like to thank you all for reading the effect of my jealousy to be like the PC! Now if you excuse me, I have to leave. ;) Wait! Do ghosts wink? Wait, I'm not a ghost, I'm a spirit! ~xoxo Olivia R.

An airhead, as usual. But hey, you gotta laugh!

Bye- bye! ^_^


End file.
